What’s the Hottest Hot Chocolate in Town?

What’s the best beverage on a cold day in late December? Today, I will be visiting three different cafes to determine which one serves the best hot chocolate within a 2-mile radius of Gilman. (Anton Grib ‘26 decided that he wanted to visit the Candy Cane Forest, so he was in Candyland and unavailable for this review.) Thus, I had to set out on my own. The three spots I visited included two popular chains, Starbucks and Dunkin' Donuts, as well as a family-run business called Ovenbird Bakery, located near the Rotunda. 

When I pulled into Starbucks, I watched as nine people ordered before I could finally place my order for a small hot chocolate. The hot chocolate was approximately 6oz, and this miniature refreshment cost a whopping $5.00. The process of making the drink took around 30 seconds, yet I did not receive my warm beverage until eight minutes after I ordered it. When I received my drink, I realized that the whipped cream had already melted. Additionally, the drink was lukewarm to my tongue. The only redeeming quality was that the hot chocolate was not overly sweet. This drink was by far the worst of the three hot beverages. I would go as far as to say that Starbucks’ attempt at hot chocolate was a glorious opportunity, squandered. 

At Dunkin’ Donuts, I was able to receive my drink just a minute after ordering. Their “small” size was twice the size of the Starbucks hot chocolate and cost a little more than half its price. As soon as I started to sip, the roof of my tongue started to feel the heat, which, in my opinion, is exactly what you want from a hot chocolate. Dunkin’s was the sweetest of the bunch (as expected), which I also appreciated because you actually tasted a milky, rich chocolate, not hot water with chocolate (like Starbucks’ version). 

Finally, I arrived at Ovenbird Bakery. Before ordering, I immediately knew that this hot chocolate would taste great. The atmosphere was quite lively, with many people talking and ordering pastries, rather than working on their computers with earbuds in (Starbucks). The bakery offered me five different options, including soy and almond, for what type of milk to use with the hot chocolate. I chose organic whole milk, as I intended to have the most traditional drink. The cost came out to $4.50, and the taste was exquisite. It was not just hot chocolate. It was destiny in a mug, rich and resonant, warming the soul the way only the truly great ever can. 

I believe that both Dunkin’ Donuts and Ovenbird Bakery are great options for hot chocolate, but if you dare to venture to Starbucks, your foolish actions will lead to utter misery and shame.