Snow Day Superstitions

As the gloomy specter of winter weather looms over Gilman, many students are seeking the only salvation a harsh winter can offer: a snow day off from school. Students make no secret of their desire to spend a day enjoying the snow rather than in the classroom. In the words of Hayden Dodge ‘26, “It’s too close to graduation for me to take school seriously, but it’s not warm enough for teachers to relax. Carson and I are this close to giving ourselves norovirus to get a few days off.” 

Short of spreading infectious diseases, students are known to take extreme measures to avoid coming into school. Many of Gilman’s more superstitious students believe that certain actions the night before a predicted snowfall can guarantee a day off. A 2023 study conducted by the American Society of Delusional Meteorologists showed that the correct series of actions the night before a flurry can increase snowfall by over twenty inches. Many students have cited their findings as verifiable evidence that their superstitions can get them a day off from school.

Many members of Gilman know the classic tricks to try and guarantee a heavy snowfall: sleeping with a spoon or cotton balls under your pillow, flushing ice cubes down your toilet, putting on your pajamas backwards and/or inside-out, brushing your teeth with your non-dominant hand, yelling “Snow day!” into the freezer, or putting a white crayon on every windowsill. However, to combat the devastating effects of global warming, students have decided that their best shot of a snow day is to combine strategies to maximise their odds of success. The Snooze conducted a poll of every Gilman student except Frankie Alonso ‘26 (for obvious reasons) to see what tactics they were using to generate an extra heavy snowfall:

It goes without saying that all of these responses were write-in options because our team of researchers would have never guessed any students would be doing anything like this. The most popular option by a good margin was to flush your bed down the toilet followed closely by shouting “Snow Day!” at your spoons. 

Our research team was surprised and frankly concerned by the lengths students are going to avoid attending school. To maintain our journalistic integrity, The Snooze cannot endorse any of these options for getting a snow day off, but our staff would like to remind students that Gilman provides a wide range of counseling and mental health services to any students who are feeling an overwhelming sense of desperation.